LIVE REPORT: Mystinen Musaa Kabaree
Mystical Muse Cabaret
Alakulttuuritalo Alimus, Helsinki; October 23rd, 2024
In recent years, I’ve become more interested in the other performing arts found in Finland. This has largely meant that I’ve been listening to a lot of local indie artists, but through Kosmos Festival and Helsinki Psyche Fest I’ve discovered a lot of really cool performers that do really awesome stuff. Among them are Safa Solati (Whirling Lifedance) and Jasmine Oriental Dance (Nanette Vasiljevic). You can imagine my surprise and delight then, when I realized that both of them were performing on the same night at the Mystinen Muusa Kabaree, aka the Mystical Muse Cabaret, at Alakulttuuritalo Alimus on October 23rd, 2024. This seemed like a promising night of something a little bit different for me!
I was very curious to check out the Alimus venue, as I hadn’t heard much about it. To my surprise, when I got to town, I realized that I had visited this venue once before. Some handful of years ago, Tuonela Magazine’s editor and I had visited the place under different ownership to see if Tuonela could potentially host some live shows there and one of the then-owners gave us a tour. It’s a very trippy venue, right out of a dream the way the backstage is set up, and we had been interested in pursuing the venue as a location for regular gigs, but the fellow who showed us around ghosted every message we sent him thereafter. Afterwards, I just sort of forgot about the place, since it never came up again. It seems that the owners have changed and thus Alimus has risen from its ashes.
Images by Auvo Takkinen (IG @atp_kuvat)
I arrived at the venue and was greeted by friendly doormen and the woman with the list was so sweet and needlessly apologetic that I felt like I was back in Canada for a moment. Then, after I proceeded to fall down the stairs, thus making for a dramatic entrance, I was able to look around the venue (I was fine, just a couple of bruises and scrapes). There were a few booths set up: one from the familiar local noita puoti [witch shoppe], one for an artist who had amazing pin-up prints that celebrate real bodies, and one selling cabaret items, from nipple covers to headbands and other jewelry and adornments.
The show was apparently running a bit late, but that was okay because I had gotten to town a wee bit later than I had hoped, meaning I didn’t miss anything. Melody Magical was the event producer and host, who acted as the muse, showing up in a new outfit between each act and dramatically reading the artists’ introductions. She had a lot of personality on display: firstly, she sang a song, completely unaccompanied, that acted as an introduction to the event, but she had a few more songs throughout the night as well, one of which was indeed accompanied by some music. A lot of what she was reading had the crowd in stitches, so it seemed that she was doing a rather good job of acting as the host. At some point early on, she was asking where everyone was from… in hindsight, I should have shouted “Canada,” just to see how she’d react. Alas, a missed opportunity.
The first performer was Polkadot Peggy, whose theme was that of the flamingo, as she came out in an extravagant pink outfit, acting as the first of many stripteases of the night, with a strong emphasis on the tease. Everyone was clapping along and when her booty was revealed, she got big cheers from folks young and old.
Next up was the first of my teachers, Safa Solati doing her whirling lifedance. If I had the means, I would go see her every time she performs, because there’s something so mesmerizing about watching her. Now that I know a little bit about her dance, I began to recognize some of what she was doing. For example, the hand that faces upwards takes energy from the sun, while the hand that faces downwards releases it unto the earth. Ahh, and then came the second half, where the lights dimmed and she activated the LED lights on the skirt. At first, I was concerned that it couldn’t be seen, but it was just a dramatic reveal, like that of many of the other performers. Eventually, she let her hair down and just appeared to lose herself in the spin, doing all these wonderful movements with her arms—it was both inspiring and emotional, bringing a tear to my eye. No one is sure if Safa will continue to stay in Finland after this year, so you should definitely take every chance to see her perform or attend her classes while there’s still a chance!
Images by Auvo Takkinen (IG @atp_kuvat)
Following right afterwards was my other teacher, Jasmine Oriental Dance. She has been such an inspiration to me and has inadvertently helped me learn a lot about my perception of myself and my gender through her classes, as I have tried to follow her guidance through these beautiful, elegant movements that are so foreign to me. This was only my second time seeing her perform, but it was very cool to see how magically all of the movements she’s been teaching us come together in a performance… and damn, that outfit! Watching her was absolute magic, nothing less. Oriental dance is a wonderful celebration of femininity and it’s incredible to see. Also, the balance and control that allows her to perform with a sword on her head is just so cool.
Images by Auvo Takkinen (IG @atp_kuvat)
These were two of the most unique performances of the night, as the next few performers went back to the more traditional cabaret stripteases. Nene Lafors came out in a pink dressing gown, passing candies out to the audience and flirting with them, until the music changed to a more rockin’ version of “Yummy Yummy Yummy” by Ohio Express. She had a fabulous reveal of some fancy bloomers, but of course, those didn’t stay on very long… she needed the freedom to twerk it up something fierce; the music had changed again to a dirty song about taking you to the candy shop as she poured the last of her bon-bons on herself and jiggled majestically.
The next introduction spoke of the brides of Dracula: Nancy Bites. Hers was one of the most creepy and alluring performances of the evening, dressed in all white, with many pale drapings to be removed. She began on an elegant note to either a music box tune or perhaps a lullaby, before the song changed to something more twisted, and her dance became far more unsettling. A vampire slayer appeared and pierced her, the bloody red stream coming from her breast leading into a ribbon dance. She was somewhere between a haunted mime and a demon, so I really enjoyed her show.
The next introduction spoke of piña coladas, as Kaffe Bööna came out wearing a cute little coconut dress, hidden behind palm fronds. She had a really great reveal of a second skirt after tossing aside her coconuts, as well as some fun reveals with the top half of her outfit as well. She was definitely a highlight amongst the stripteases.
Images by Auvo Takkinen (IG @atp_kuvat)
Melody Magical returned once again to sing her second song… one of those songs about being mad about you. I know I’ve heard the song before but didn’t know it by name, alas. It was nevertheless a very femme fatale moment. The intermission followed, where we had some time to get drinks or purchase the burlesque decorations and other trinkets from the shops. The intermission was eventually broken by two performers, Minna Kivelä and Ria Kataja, who had a strong Kummeli energy—you know, over-the-top costumes, goofy voices; it’s a style that sounds like children’s comedy but made for adults. Unfortunately for me, most of the nuances of their jokes were lost thanks to my mediocre Finnish, but there was some visual humor wherein they joined the cabaret, awkwardly dancing and removing their reinot, and one of them had taken her pants off and tucked her winter coat into her underpants, so you can, of course, get an idea of what it was like. They also seemed in charge of drawing names for some prizes.
After the intermission, we were treated to another unusual performance from Jimi Råman and Petteri Kallio, who were from the noita puoti, doing a dramatic performance of poetry, with Petteri accompanying with a shaman drum. I was interested in what they were doing, especially since Jimi was covered in a lot of runes and paint, but unfortunately, I didn’t catch a lot of what the poem was about.
The next performer, Veda DeCadenza, had the most gorgeous purple outfit that really stood out as glorious. She had a wonderful tease, with a particularly good bum reveal and a really dramatic finale. I was a bit enraptured at this point, which is why I seem to have not taken enough notes… oops! Then came another really cool performance from Honey Rocket that had a bit more dance in it, done largely to “Where the Dark Things Are” by Kerli. She had a really evil sort of performance too, worshipping old gods and that sort of thing, making it another one of the stand-out performances of the night.
The evening’s main performances wrapped up with The Shangri-la Showgirls, a collective of toga-laden beauties who did a big group choreography that involved those wonderful flowing ribbon fans. They were a spectacular group to wrap up the event and leave the viewer wanting more.
Images by Auvo Takkinen (IG @atp_kuvat)
Overall, I really enjoyed the evening! It was perhaps a bit of a shame that the more unique performances were largely lumped together, and the show was also fairly front-heavy, but Mystinen Muusa Kabaree nevertheless had a spectacular display of talent to share and made for a very fun and entertaining night, with a lot of beautiful bodies to be shown off in creative and personal ways. Regarding my own experience, this night made me realize how truly disconnected I’ve been from my feminine side my whole life… I’ve never even considered that I could look or perform like these artists, which was a sort of revelation… it doesn’t come naturally, but it is still possible if I were so inclined.
Keep an eye on Superfiilis Tapahtumat for more Sala Cabaree events like this in the future! The next one will take place on December 5th, 2024: Sala Cabaree Joulu Spektaakkeli, so be sure to check it out if you find yourself available that night!
Performance Order
Melody Magical
Polkadot Peggy
Safa Solati - Whirling Lifedance
Jasmine Oriental Dance
Nene Lafors
Nancy Bites
Kaffe Bööna
Minna Kivelä & Ria Kataja
Jimi Råman & Petteri Kallio
Veda DeCadenza
Honey Rocket
The Shangri-La Showgirls
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